Right now Chris is at Walmart with both kids. It's nice to have a little time. Overall, Cameron is truly the most fun, cute, obedient, silly little boy I could ever want. But there are often times I find myself frustrated and discouraged. I have a lot of guilt for having these feelings. I know, all kids make their moms go nuts sometimes. But those things are "typical" things such as tantrums, not sharing, etc. Because some of the things I have a hard time with are issues that Cam can't control, I feel badly that they get to me.
I'm not going to go into what they are because I feel like that would be disrespectful, in a sense, to him as my son. Why post actions that frustrate me when he has no control over them? But I will say that sometimes I feel like I wish he would throw tantrums, and that those would be our only struggle and something he would grow out of. But that isn't our reality. Things he deals with will get better, but might not ever fully be gone.
On a side note, isn't it interesting that even when you are so frustrated with one of your children, it really only takes about 15 minutes of time away from them to calm down and actually start missing them? By the time they get back from Walmart, I'll be ready to see my little man. I love that.
6 comments:
I think you do an excellent job of "talking to yourself." Gary (pastor) said once that we too often LISTEN to ourselves (listen to our discouraging thoughts)...when what we should do instead is TALK to ourselves (speak truth to ourselves). That's what you're doing when you remind yourself of what a wonderful little boy Cameron is, how blessed you are to have him, & what great plans God has for his life. Keep it up when you get discouraged!
I hope your break did you good :)
We all have our struggles as parents, you are definitely not alone! I often read your blog and think what a great, loving, creative and fun mom you are.
I try to remind myself that I do my best, and God does the rest :)
Yes, a little break does wonders! I'm sorry you're feeling a little discouraged... By the way, I like your thoughts about what you will and won't share - I think you're wise. It's tricky to find the balance there.
Mom - I LOVE those thoughts about listening vs. talking to ourselves!
Great post, Kelly. I love your honesty and your desire to respect Cameron in the process. Thanks for your perspective too. It amazes me too how I can be DONE with my kids, and then miss them 30 minutes later when Kevan takes them out to give me a break. Mothering is truly a mystery sometimes!
-Bethany
I'm so sorry you've had some hard days! It is truly never fun! I'm glad you could have a break, they truly do refresh us if just for a few minutes!!
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